I’m a mom of little kids, of course people think that I’m supposed to want to be around them all of the time.

As a mom, I’ve been navigating a very delicate balance of caring for my children while also carving out space to care for myself. I am always thinking of creative ways to include them while also making sure I am getting what I need, in solitude.

From very early in my journey as a parent, I have discovered the importance of creating boundaries that support self-care. Most moms are expected to handle the nurturing of the home, which is an amazing responsiblity to have. However, taking care of others only comes easy when you are allowing space for proper care for yourself.

This isn’t new. We hear this all of the time. “You can’t pour from an empty cup.” And still, the struggle to find time for self and reconnecting with who we are is something that many of us relate to.

I currently work from home while also caring for my 2 year old and let me tell you, it’s not for weak. The balance can be difficult but with proper time management and routines set for my little one, I am able to manage. Even in the 8-9 hours of me working and nurturing at the same time, I make sure to make time for myself each day. And not just in the early morning and when everyone is asleep.

Some of the boundaries that I set includes taking time for me on the weekends to sit in coffee shops and write. Running some of my errands alone. And my shower/facial time.

I am no good for my family when I’m not well. And well isn’t just about physical health. It’s about mental health also. In fact, it’s more about mental health more than physical health because you can essentially do more damage to the people in your family when your mental state isn’t in the best shape.

I think that sometimes it’s easy to see self-care as optional because most people only talk about it in reference to baths and skin care. And while these things are a part of it, it’s so much more deeper than that.

I also make time for therapy bi-weekly while my daughter naps. I block my calendar for just one hour and get to talk out all of the things that I need to. And I allow myself some time to settle from after the therapy session before getting back to my duties.

There were times in the beginning where I would feel guilt about leaving my kids with someone even if it’s my husband, but I don’t feel that way at all now. Because ultimately my husband knows that I’ll be better for the family when I return from spending time by myself.

And then of course, there are times when I can’t get it like I want to. My facial routine may include a little person or two. So how do I still care for myself in those times when I can’t get away? I let them share in it. My 6 year old loves to do facials with me. So this gives me the opportunity to teach her how to care for her skin and spend quality time with her while still doing the thing that I actually need to do for myself. And if the littlest one is around, we’ll work around that too. Eventually she’ll grow to want to join in the facial festivities also.

When I work out from home, I let my children see and many times they may join in. It’s important that they see me working out or going to the gym so that they know that this is a way of life and not just something you do in PE. While many times the toddler will crawl under me and I have to be careful of her being in the way, I’m still able to get it done as best as I can.

Self care is just as much about the intention as it is about what you’re actually doing. And while I hold on to the boundaries that I have made for myself, even when I can’t get peace and quiet to do some of these things, I still do them.

This has also helped me change my perception of what it means to take care of yourself. Because we sometimes forget that no matter what is happening in our lives, it’s always important to take care of ourselves. And I’m determined to stay devoted to taking care of me through every stage, through every version, through every trial and through every triumph. You don’t ever graduate from having to care for yourself.

This is why I am doing Take Care Tuesdays. To remind myself and others that we have to keep caring for us. In all ways. No it won’t always be perfect but like I said, the intention can go a long way. Sometimes I get down on myself when I realize that it’s been a couple of days since I’ve last worked out or did a full mask or journaled, but I find ways to extend grace to myself because no matter what I always find a way to come back to it. My practices are always there to meet me with open arms, full of healing and relaxation. I hope that this read has encouraged to prioritize caring for yourself also.

Until next time,

Take care.